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That first brutal gust of hallway air still haunts my bones – that moment when your key turns in the lock after a red-eye flight, only to be punched in the face by Arctic emptiness. I’d stand there in December darkness, luggage abandoned, fingers numb as I fumbled at the thermostat like some frostbitten safecracker. My teeth would chatter morse code insults while the ancient boiler groaned awake with all the urgency of a hibernating bear. Those were the nights I’d huddle under three blankets wat

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