fart prank 2025-11-07T02:49:54Z
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That stubborn red number on my bathroom scale hadn't budged in 17 days. Seventeen mornings of hopeful steps onto cold metal, seventeen evenings of pushing away dessert while my family indulged. My reflection showed tighter muscles yet the digital judge refused to acknowledge my effort. The familiar panic started bubbling - maybe I needed to slash calories again, maybe double cardio sessions. Then Fittr Health & Fitness Coach pinged with my weekly body composition analysis, revealing what my scal -
Rain lashed against the bathroom window as I stepped onto that cold, judgmental rectangle of glass for the 47th consecutive morning. Same blinking digits. Same hollow victory. My knuckles whitened around the towel rack - all those dawn burpees and kale sacrifices rendered meaningless by three unflinching numbers. That morning, I nearly kicked the damn thing into the shower. -
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That Tuesday night's Discord silence was thick enough to choke on. Seven of us floating in Among Us with only the hum of background noise and half-hearted "where are you"s. My fingers drummed the desk, eyes glazing over the emergency meeting button. Then I remembered the alien trumpet sound I'd saved earlier – a ridiculous, squelchy blast that sounded like an elephant choking on a kazoo. One tap. The voice channel exploded. Sarah snorted soda through her nose, Mark's wheezing laugh turned into a -
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