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Rain lashed against the taxi window in Barcelona as the meter ticked higher than my panic threshold. My phone buzzed - another bank alert. That's when I felt it: the cold sweat of financial cluelessness creeping down my spine. Three cards in my wallet, zero idea which wouldn't decline when we reached the hotel. My travel partner's sideways glance mirrored my shame - the modern disgrace of being a grown adult who can't decipher his own money. That night in a cramped hostel bathroom, I downloaded

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I remember the exact moment my stomach dropped faster than the altcoin market – somewhere over the Atlantic, seatbelt sign illuminated, when Ethereum started its terrifying 17% nosedive. My knuckles turned white around the plastic cup of tepid coffee as I frantically stabbed at the seatback entertainment screen, trying in vain to load trading charts through the plane's glacial WiFi. Sweat prickled my neck despite the cabin's chill when suddenly – ping – my phone lit up with a crimson notificatio

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That sinking feeling hit me again at 12:57 PM last Sunday - three minutes before lock. Scrolling through the WhatsApp nightmare, I saw Dave's "Takin' Dolphins" buried under fifteen memes, Sarah's "LV Raiders???" with three question marks, and Mike's spreadsheet screenshot that looked like abstract art. My thumb hovered over the keyboard, sweat making the screen slippery, as I tried to remember if anyone actually picked the damn Bengals. This ritual felt less like football and more like defusing

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