Bonjour protocol 2025-09-11T02:35:55Z
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That Thursday night disaster still burns in my memory. Game of Thrones' Battle of Winterfell climaxed - dragons swirling in blizzard darkness - when my toddler hurled the physical remote into a bowl of salsa. As Daenerys faced the Night King, I faced a sticky plastic corpse with unresponsive buttons. Frantic wiping only smeared guacamole across dead controls while HBO's "Are you still watching?" taunted me. Pure cinematic torture.