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Rain lashed against the windowpane at 2:47 AM when existential dread gripped me by the throat. How many rotations around the sun had I truly completed? My foggy brain couldn't compute beyond "thirty-something" as digital clock digits mocked my temporal confusion. That's when I discovered the chronological truth-teller hiding in my app library. With trembling fingers, I entered my birth details and gasped as real-time digits materialized: 12,415 days, 7 hours, 22 minutes and counting. Suddenly my

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